


Behind the mask

by casualkidtragedy



Category: Dragon Ball
Genre: Chichi is bad here don't hate me plz, F/M, Frieza is a prick, I'm Bad At Summaries, M/M, Past Rape/Non-con, Please Don't Hate Me, Vegeta is in heat, smart/bitter Goku
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-23
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:54:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26618524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/casualkidtragedy/pseuds/casualkidtragedy
Summary: We are all acting in some points of our lives. Some do better than others, and for some, it's the only way to keep their mask on.But does it worth to hide your true self?
Relationships: Bulma Briefs/Vegeta, Chi-Chi/Son Goku (Dragon Ball), Son Goku/Vegeta (Dragon Ball)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 36





	1. My real nature

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TheRainisnotClear](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRainisnotClear/gifts), [Jazzydazzy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jazzydazzy/gifts).



_“I cannot maintain  
  
a semblance of normal anymore  
  
I’d rather feel pain  
  
than try to fit in with you anymore”  
  
(Slipknot - Gehenna)_

  
  
They pictured me as a happy-go-lucky, all the time hungry idiot. To be honest, the hunger was constant but I wasn’t as stupid as I seemed. It was my decision. Life was much, much easier when people believed that I was completely clueless. They thought I didn’t know how they talked about me when I wasn’t around. Oh, sweet summer children...  
I lit a cigarette. I took up this habit a little after I came back to Earth. My so-called marriage with Chichi was a complete disaster. She cheated on me, but she was throwing stones... or I rather say pans at me.  
  
If I’d have been that stupid as she treated me, maybe I’d have let it go. But being a Saiyan came with a more sensitive smell than she ever could imagine. No perfume could hide the smell of sex and I knew Chichi enough, how she behaved after it. But I was waiting. I’ll get my revenge when the right time comes. I won’t hurt her, I’m not like that. But she’ll pay for all the abusement I suffered during those long years.  
  
Yes. Physically, I am the stronger one. But she found the weakness on my wall of defense: my mental state. I still couldn't forget what I did to grandpa Gohan. One of the things I will remember every single day of my life. There were and still are many things I can't deal with without help. One of them is always feeling like an outsider. For humans, I'm an alien from a faraway planet that became stardust a little after my birth. And for the only one who could understand me, I'm just a dumbass who has no clue about anything in life. Guess who played himself.  
  
The only thing which kept me going and not saying _fuck it_ and leave everything behind was the fact that Chichi would say more bullshit about me to my sons than she already did. I know, I wasn’t the father of the year but I always fought for my family and friends. Even if they didn’t appreciate it.  
  
Vegeta seemed to understand me… Sometimes. But other times he wasn’t different from the others. His attitude perplexed me a lot and I found it rather exciting. There were times when it even made me horny. I never fucked a man before but I thought a lot about it. Once I mentioned it to Chichi but she was freaked out… But man, that ass was literally screaming for a good fuck. During the years I got to know the prince enough to see when he missed sex and I’d have been more than happy to please him… But I knew I had to wait. How hard it was to keep my eyes off from his crotch when he was wearing his spandex…  
  
But I know I’ll get my chance.  
  
“Do you smoke? Since when?”  
  
Bulma’s voice brought me back to reality.  
  
“Uh-eeh, I just… I was a little nervous. But I’m okay.”  
  
I spoke with my usual movement, my hand scratched the back of my neck, making me look like the idiot everyone thought I was.  
  
“Did you argue with his mighty Assholeness again?” she asked with a small frown.  
  
The fact was I did, but it happened days ago. It was a stupid argument about some prank that our boys pulled on him but that wasn’t the reason I walked out of Capsule Corp. to smoke again. I was on the edge. I knew I couldn’t play further the stupid one but I was afraid of losing everything.  
  
“Give me one as well.” Vegeta said as he stepped outside of the building.  
  
He didn’t seem surprised at all, but I knew him better than that. He could hide his emotions under his expressionless mask but since we fused I was able to feel them. He didn’t even have a chance to lie to me. I handed him the whole pack, he took one and lit it.  
  
“Earthlings…” he sighed.  
  
A small puff of smoke left his mouth but I only paid attention to the fact that he wasn’t wearing his spandex. He had a pair of navy blue jeans and a white shirt on which wasn’t buttoned up, letting me see a little of his chest. I was eager to touch him but I restrained myself. He liked to play hard to get and I was way more patient than he ever thought.  
  
“What did she say?” I asked curiously.  
  
He smelt so good… I wanted to jump on him and make him scream my name with pleasure. But not now.  
  
“She’s becoming more and more annoying.”  
  
_Or you don’t get what you need but you don’t want to talk about your sexual life, do you?_  
  
I was watching his lips, imagining something I’ll never get from the prince of all Saiyans. Yes, you pervert, a blowjob would be nice. Imagine him blushing, while he’s doing it… I always loved him even more, when those pink spots appeared on his cheeks. But I’m just daydreaming…  
  
“Kakarot?”  
  
From his lips, my original name sounded special. Not something that made me remember what happened to our home planet.  
  
“Yes?”  
  
“What is it? You’re being suspiciously too quiet.”  
  
I felt some worry in his voice, disguised by his usual annoyance.  
  
“I have to make some important decisions.”  
  
He started to laugh almost hysterically. Like I would have told the funniest joke in the universe.  
“Don’t think too much, it’ll make your head hurt.”  
  
I wanted t  
o make him beg for me to fuck him. His slim but muscular body would be just perfect against mine and if we could get back our tails, everything would be even better...  
“Thanks for the wise words.”  
  
“Sarcasm? Who are you and what did you do to… Kakarot?”  
  
He didn’t say ‘my’ but that two seconds of hesitancy meant the world to me.  
  
“It’s me, Vegeta. No one else.”  
  
I almost said ‘my prince’… But my attention was diverted by a nice little tent in his jeans. Merciful Saiya, is it a sign for me? Does he want me as much as I want him?  
  
_Is it because of me? Or you just miss a good fuck?_  
  
He blushed madly when he realised I saw it. I smiled back at him, but he attacked me immediately. I blocked his fists easily because he wasn’t concentrating on the fight. His anger controlled him and it was Vegeta’s worst weakness. I powered up to Super Saiyan in order to end the brawling quickly. I locked him into my arms and didn’t let him move. He was hissing and growling death threats at me which made me hard as well… I pressed my hips against his firm ass, making him moan out loud with need.  
  
“I thought we are fighting and not fucking.” I said as sarcastically as I could.  
  
“Let me go you fucking horny bastard or I’ll -- _AHH_!” he screamed when I pressed our bodies together as tight as possible.  
  
My lips curled up to an evil smirk, as he tried to power up, but failed doing so. His golden hair quickly turned back to obsidian, and his muscles felt less tense than before.  
  
_And we are not even fucking… yet. But it’s good to know how I can make you scream._  
  
“Stop it…” he panted, but his voice sounded otherwise, almost begging.  
  
I licked along the line of his neck, making him tremble.  
  
“I- I said… stop…” he panted, still fighting himself.  
  
He was so helpless. So hard, so needy and so stupid.  
  
_Why don’t you let yourself enjoy it…?_  
  
“Do you really want me to?” I purred in a low tone.  
  
It was now or never.  
“I can give you the pleasure you’re missing since god knows how long… I saw it in your eyes.”  
  
I powered down to show him I will treat him like he needs to be, but he suddenly broke out of my arms and punched me in the gut. It hurt, but I was rather surprised than actually in pain.  
  
“Don’t ever dare to talk to me again.” he said in a death serious tone, glaring at me with those ebony eyes.  
  
I wanted to laugh. His pride is bigger than I ever dared to tought… I bowed before him.  
  
“See you later then, your Highness.”  
  
I touched my forehead and disappeared.


	2. Princely troubles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vegeta is... well, Vegeta. A prince never disappoints.

I woke up feeling like my whole body would be on fire. Great. My heat started but the onna wasn’t able to satisfy my need without suffering serious or even lethal injuries. I hated to admit, but she grew on me after giving birth to our son and even more after having Bulla later.  
  
Deep down I knew what I should do to turn my heat into something more enjoyable, but I denied the urge. I won’t jump into the arms of a third-class just because he’s the only Saiyan left except for my brother.  
  
I often thought of Tarble… My little brother. He seems weak, but has a great strength sleeping within. He just prefers not fighting if it is possible. But he proved me wrong about my previous beliefs of his absolute weakness and helplessness. He fought Frieza’s henchmen who were terrorizing his planet, even though he knew he’s no match for those trained bastards. And only after that decided to seek our help to protect his wife and home.  
  
For a very long time, he was a barely alive cub in my memories. We couldn’t spend much time together, and it took its toll on our relationship, though Tarble seems to adore me for my strength and will to survive.  
  
My thoughts were distracted by the smell of Kakarot. I’d never miss that earthy and musky odour. Typical for a third-class, but still a Saiyan smell, which made my subconscious happy. I sensed the onna as well. They were talking about me, and she called me an asshole. I wasn’t surprised at all, she did the same right into my face.  
I got rid of my clothes and went to shower. I felt like I would kill for a good fuck or even being on the receiving end... Especially by Kakarot in his most powerful form. No… My heat is making me crazy... I’d never lower myself to sleep with a third-class again. Maybe the most of our race is dead but I’m still a royalty. But the memory of his naked body was still haunting me…  
  
Knowing a thing or two about his size, thanks to seeing him jumping into the water many times only in his birthday suit, made me even hornier than I already was. I shook my head. I can't let my heat make me act like a mindless animal. I hated to touch myself but the last time I had an orgasm and I felt completely satisfied after was when Raditz fucked me. I don't even know how he hadn’t ripped me a new asshole, but I haven’t had any other choice. Nappa annoyed the hell out of me… At least Raditz wasn’t always there when I wanted some time alone.  
  
I oftentimes imagined both of the brothers fucking me, but I knew it happened only because of my heat. But the dreams about Kakarot continued even if it was gone... He was screwing the life out of me and in a few dreams, I was carrying his cubs. He was kneeling before me, kissing my round stomach. I woke up feeling strangely happy and calm after those. Maybe my subconscious was trying to tell me something. Bah. Like I’d have been listening ever.  
  
I felt someone smoking near the house, but it wasn’t the menthol flavoured cigarette the onna liked. I went to check it out, because the person’s ki felt like it would be Kakarot’s. I was truly surprised when I saw _him_ , sitting with his back to the wall. Since when he’s smoking? I never felt the smell of it on him… Seeing him so unusually deep in thought made me a little suspicious. But I had an important problem: I was getting hard again. And to the top of the imaginary cake, he saw it… I tried to distract him by attacking him, doing my hardest to seem angry. But when he hugged me and pressed his hard cock against my ass, I completely lost it.  
“I thought we are fighting and not fucking.”  
  
The bastard. He was teasing me! He licked along my neck, purring softly. Why did the fucking idiot know how to turn me on? I wanted him to stop it… Not because it felt bad. No… But I didn’t want to throw myself at him like the cheapest man-whore in the world. I didn’t know why but I broke out of his arms and punched him hard in the gut. He seemed surprised and betrayed. My poor Kakarot… You have to fight way harder to get my heart.  
  
“See you later, your Highness.”  
  
None called me that since years, except the onna, but I felt sarcasm in her voice when she said it. Kakarot disappeared from my eyes.


	3. My name is Kakarot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Decisions, decisions... And horny thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all of you the support and love, both here and on Twitter. It makes me extremely happy! ♡♡♡
> 
> I will probably edit this chapter once more for wording and grammar issues.
> 
> AU, so please don't @ me for timeline issues!
> 
> xoxo

The urge to jump on Vegeta was too strong. If I had stayed one more minute I was sure we would have a session he would never forget. I tried to distract my mind, but it was full of pictures of a certain prince, especially a naked version of him. I wanted to feel his strong arms around me while I’m giving him the time of his life. I bet my brother fucked him, but he wasn’t enjoying it as much as if I would do it. Hell, I wanted him so much… But I needed to wait. I’ll get my proud prince.  
  
I decided to fly home, even if I didn’t want to argue with Chichi and smell that man's scent on her again... She welcomed me with her brightest smile, the one made me fell in love with her so long ago. But I stepped away when she tried to hug me.  
  
“Goku-sa?” she asked, tilting her head a bit, looking at me questioningly with her midnight black eyes.  
  
_Stop pulling that oh-so-surprised face…_  
  
“I cooked your favorites…” she purred in a fulsome voice, trying to distract me with her looks. “What’s wrong with you?”  
  
She was reeking with that odor… I clenched my fists, trying to suppress the raging Saiyan within, which demanded a massive bloodbath for such a betrayal.  
  
“You’re cheating on me since Goten was born.” I stated coldly.  
  
That was the first crack on my mask. I just couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t play the clueless idiot, the fool, the clown, whatever they called me behind my back, or even said it right to my face.  
  
“Why do you think that, Goku-sa?”  
  
She tried her best to hide her blush, but in vain. I already knew. She’s been doing it for years, thinking I am dumb enough to only care about having something to eat and fighting with powerful opponents. But I am more. Much, much more than just a dumbass who's willing to die for his friends, if the situation requires. I know, I did things that seemed illogical and put tons of lives in extreme danger. Vegeta _loves_ to remind me of my fight with Frieza, but never thinks through why did I do it.  
  
“My name is Kakarot.” I said to her in an emotionless voice. ”I am a Saiyan. Everyone tried to make me act like a human, in the name of what you call friendship or love, trying to “help me to fit in”, but what if I am happy with being different?”  
  
I let the words sink in. I detached myself from a made-up personality. The almost-human, happy-go-lucky Goku, who neither can be accepted as a friend of humans, nor can be Saiyan enough for his prince. Time changes mortals, as the Kaioshins say.  
  
“What were you thinking? That I would never notice?” I continued, “I’m not an idiot as you all treat me and I have a way better sense of smell than a _puny_ human ever could imagine.”  
  
She was speechless. Her face went as pale as the virgin snow, when realization kicked in. I was way too patient… No, just simply too stupid to keep thinking I can do this forever. I wasn’t yelling or threatening her and I thought it hurt her even more.  
  
“You were always ‘training’… And I felt so alone. I don’t want to justify what I did, but I was always waiting for you to come back to me… But I had to understand you won’t change. Fighting always will be more important than anything else.”  
  
_Oh, the good old guilt tripping._  
  
I was expecting it, but not so soon...  
  
_So, training to be able to fight harder and saving your sorry ass is my fault. Well then, I will keep it in mind next time._  
  
“Do the boys know?”  
  
“Goten doesn’t. But I’m not sure if Gohan…”  
  
I cut her off. There's no need for more lies. It already pained my heart to think that Gohan and Goten may see me physically strong, but mentally weak. I took a deep breath, and told her:  
  
“You can reveal it to everyone, because it’s over between us.”  
  
She was stupefied. I saw her opening her mouth to scream at me, but no sound came out. It took her a few seconds to switch from being stunned to let her anger rule over her.  
  
“But I was good when you wanted food and sex!” she yelled at me.  
  
We have never been the perfect pair, but before she started seeing the _other one_ , we could always find a solution to our problems... I was even happy. I saw her as my other half, even though her temper oftentimes wasn't to my liking.  
  
Vegeta often mentioned _Saiyan pride_ while we were sparring, but I never understood it truly. I thought it’s only a part of his hubris and arrogance. But when I found out what my wife is doing behind my back, I immediately know, it has awakened in me. I never felt such an intense urge to kill... To murder someone in the most gruesome way possible. But I kept everything to myself.  
  
“Don’t make me laugh! We only fucked twice!”  
  
“Because you were hurting me!”  
  
I sighed loudly. My inner turmoil was much harder to control than I thought. I struggled to keep my ki on the regular level to keep things as peaceful as possible. I didn't want anyone to come and try to “help”.  
  
“I always told you to tell me, if you don’t feel good…”  
  
I still talked at my usual volume of speech, but I felt like a ticking bomb that can explode at any moment.  
  
She hesitantly tried to throw a pan at me, but I dodged it with a smirk, making her furious. Was she questioning herself? For a second, I thought she still has feelings for me. But the smell made me realize again, there is no more us, it slowly became she and me, separately.  
  
“Don’t worry, I’ll leave this house without fighting. I won’t stay here a second longer where you have been fucking with another man in _our_ bed.”  
  
Goten arrived home at the best time and tried to step between us, preventing me or his mother from doing something stupid. I oftentimes saw some of my younger self’s traits in him. But he was not a mini me, and I tried to respect his wish to let him find a path he wants to follow. He still had many years to figure it out anyways.  
  
“Let the adults do their thing.” Chichi said to him in a surprisingly calm voice. “Don’t you have homework to do?”  
  
“I am done with it. As much as done with you two quarrelling about everything. I am tired of trying – and failing – to be like Gohan. I am not so smart like he is, I am rather interested in fighting and how to protect those who are important to me.” Goten let out a little sigh “I love you both and it really hurts to see you two like this...”  
  
He turned to me. Though he was a teen, his eyes seemed more serious than ever.  
  
“I am sorry, dad. I betrayed you... I tried to act like I didn’t know. I wanted to believe we will be like we were when I was younger…”  
  
I nodded. I wanted the same. But this dream was long gone.  
  
“Chichi…” I started, but my voice trailed off.  
  
I didn't know what to say. I still felt my son’s eyes on me.  
  
“Don’t act like someone who cares.” Chichi spoke up, “Where were you when Gohan was younger?? Oh, I remember! You decided to stay dead and train!!”  
  
“I did it to protect all of you…”  
  
The whole argument was so pointless...  
  
I looked into Goten’s eyes and he nodded in agreement, so I put my hand on his shoulder and used my Instant Transmission to get the hell out of there. My old house where I used to live with Grandpa Gohan was in a horrible state and brought back painful memories. But I had to put everything aside and keep it together.  
  
With my younger son’s help I managed to find some nails and a hammer, so we made a tiny makeshift wooden house until I could ask for a capsule one from Bulma.  
  
“Dad, do you have any plans? I have a feeling this isn't the end of things...”  
  
“We will see. But let’s leave it for now... Are you hungry?”  
  
Goten patted his stomach with a grin.  
  
“I’ll catch something. I’ll come back soon.”  
  
I haven’t been hunting in a while, but I remembered almost everything. The smell of blood is not something you forget easily. Whether it belongs to an animal, or a friend. I planned to catch a boar or something like that, hoping Goten will be okay until I go back to him.  
  
“Can’t I go with you?”  
  
“Maybe next time, okay? I’ll be back when soon, hopefully with some food.”  
  
I hated to set traps and make animals suffer, so I hunted the old-fashioned way: with bare hands. Boars were strong and wild creatures which made the whole thing even better. I tried to end their lives as quickly as possible before I brought them home.  
  
Home… I didn’t even know the word. For the earthlings, I was an alien from a faraway planet which became stardust a little after my birth. For Vegeta, I never was a true Saiyan, one of his people.  
  
I never really felt that I belonged anywhere and the feeling started to slowly eat away my soul. I missed my family, my home planet, I have never even seen since my childhood. Even my brother. But they were gone for good, my wife was cheating on me, my kids… They barely knew me. But still, I loved them with all of my heart and wanted to protect them.  
  
Finally, I spotted an unusually big boar. It took me a pretty long time to defeat it, but I never felt so happy in my life when I finally was able to kill it. The animal fought with everything it had, causing me a few wounds, but I didn't mind any of them. It felt great to release all the stress. I was bleeding from some of the injuries, but none of them were too serious.  
  
As I arrived back to the wooden house, I gutted the boar and prepared it for being eaten. Goten came out and sat down next to me.  
  
I told him to not to worry about me, and a few minutes later gave him a small piece of meat which was ready. His face said it all. Goten sat closer to me, purring happily. I patted his head.  
  
“We need to talk.”  
  
“Then let’s talk.”  
  
“I happy to spend some time with you, it feels like when I was younger, but you should talk with mom.” “I will. But not now. Do you know how long I tried to force myself into believing that everything will be okay? I just couldn't do it anymore.”  
  
Vegeta’s appearance broke the mood. I didn’t know what happened between the two but Goten was visibly afraid of him, no matter how hard he tried to act cool around the prince.  
  
“Your banshee of a wife told everyone you kidnapped the brat.”  
  
“Oh yes, we are having a _wonderful_ day, your Highness.” I teased Vegeta “By the way, you told me to not to talk to you ever again, yet here you are, talking to me.”  
  
He seemed angry, but I didn’t care. It wasn’t my concern.  
  
“She’s not my wife anymore. She has someone else to yell and throw things at.”  
  
“Finally.” he said, then he put his gloved hands on his mouth and blushed a little.  
  
That made me crazy with need.  
  
_Dear Saiya, you have been listening!_  
  
“My younger son is called Goten, not brat or crotch goblin, as once you said.”  
  
“Why is he always angry at me?”  
  
“Honestly, I don’t know. He’s angry at everyone, even himself.”  
  
The prince growled something and flew off. He came back about an hour later and brought us a capsule. We popped it out and it was a house. Only a couple of minutes later Gohan arrived as well. Vegeta just rolled his eyes, but he said nothing.  
  
“Dad? Why did you kidnap my brother?”  
  
I looked at my firstborn confused.  
  
“Ahem, if you excuse me!” Goten spoke up, “I wasn’t kidnapped, I am here on my own free will.”  
  
The prince just furrowed his brow. Gohan kept telling me how Chichi tried to make him believe that I forced Goten to come with me.  
  
“Mom told me you two were arguing, and you teleported away with my brother.”  
  
“I think she _forgot_ to mention she is cheating on me. And she was throwing things at me again.”  
  
“Dad… I… I’m so sorry…” he bent his head sadly.  
  
“You knew.”  
  
He nodded ashamedly.  
  
“I knew it too… I was waiting. Hoping. But I couldn’t do it further when I smelt that man on her again…”  
  
I looked at my older son and asked him about his relationship to lift everyone’s mood. He blushed darkly.  
  
“I- er... Videl is pregnant.”  
  
I congratulated him on his cub and his brother did the same.  
  
“Thank you. I feel we’ll have a girl, but I’m not sure yet. But back to the topic: mom is angry.”  
  
“I don’t care anymore.”  
  
I saw the smile on Vegeta’s face. He was relieved.  
  
“I can’t live with her anymore. For obvious reasons.”  
  
He understood my point quickly. Or at least he seemed so. He smiled at his little brother and hugged him. Goten started to purr again, which surprised Gohan, but soon he followed suit.  
  
“I- I always thought it’s some weird effect of being a half-breed…”  
  
“Purring is normal for Saiyans. It means the individual is happy and feels content.” the prince said.  
  
I loved when he talked about our people... Every little bit of new information made me want to go back in time, even for just a quick visit.  
  
“Raditz purred a lot in his sleep.”  
  
Gohan remembered his uncle with a strange grimace.  
  
“I bet you don’t want to know what he’d been dreaming about…”  
  
Vegeta’s lips curled up in a little evil smirk. I so wanted to jump on him, tear his clothes off with my teeth and prove him, I am just as much of a Saiyan as he is. He smelt so good...  
  
“I’m happy without even thinking about it.” Gohan answered.  
  
He broke out into laughter and Goten just smirked at his brother.  
  
“You can’t play hide and seek forever, Kakarot.” Vegeta said in a strange voice.  
  
I often wondered what does he have under the mask of his anger, his pride and tragic past. I was almost a hundred percent sure that Frieza did something horrible to him, besides destroying _his_ kingdom, along with almost the entirety of his race.  
  
He was so quiet. He didn't even call me on names, mostly just stood in one place and watching us stoically. It was strange. Vegeta usually had a strong opinion of literally anything.  
  
“I wasn’t planning to do that.”  
  
“Dad, please come back and explain everything…” my older son tried to convince me.  
  
“I don’t wanna hear mom yelling rude things at you again…” Goten said “Can I stay with Gohan until you come back?”  
  
He was looking at us with those puppy eyes and I wasn’t able to say no, not like I planned to. I looked at my oldest who nodded.  
  
“I’ll pick him up later then. Take care!”  
  
I flew back to speak with Chichi. I sensed an unknown energy in the house, but the scent was familiar. Her new partner. The man was taller and much more muscular than me, but I’ve been fighting with enough opponents to know being bulky does not equal with great strength.  
  
“WHERE DID YOU LEFT GOTEN?” she practically screamed at me.  
  
“He’s with Gohan.” I answered in a normal volume.  
  
“Bring him back, now!”  
  
“NO.”  
  
I wasn’t yelling, just raised my voice a little to let them know I could hurt them if I would like to.  
  
“You didn’t want me to force you.” the man said threateningly.  
  
I broke out to the loudest laughter I’ve ever had in my whole life. Chichi was speechless. I thought she knew no human could be a match for me, but a crazy smile appeared on her face.  
  
“We will see who will laugh at the end, Goku-sa.”  
  
I felt something like a bug bite in the back of my neck and the world went black for me.


	4. An invisible bond

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fusion created a stronger bond than Vegeta thought.

There was a sudden drop in Kakarot’s energy. It happened sometimes. Since we fused I often felt it. But when a few hours later it still felt extremely low, it made me a little suspicious. His older brat visited me, asking if I knew anything about his father.  
  
“Am I his babysitter, or what?” I snarled at the boy.  
  
To my surprise, he let out a deep, guttural growl, which sounded just like Kakarot’s when he was angry at someone. I found it pretty arousing. I wasn't sure how long I can ignore my heat without serious consequences...  
  
“Drop the acting, Vegeta. We all know you fell for him.”  
  
_Damn you, brat!_  
  
I wasn’t able to hide the blush from my face. I just wanted to punch him and do such things to him, he never even heard of.  
  
“It’s okay.” he said, smiling. “Just help me to find him… He told me once he feels your energy even if you try to hide it.”  
  
His voice sounded so desperate, I felt pity for him. I searched for Kakarot’s energy, but I wasn’t able to locate it. His older cub looked at me with hopeful eyes. I couldn’t tell him more good news besides that his father is still alive. The idiot’s energy was dangerously low…  
  
“Your face is telling me you felt something bad. What is it?”  
  
“You are a smart brat. It’s really a waste of your talent that you stopped training.”  
  
Gohan repeated that annoyed noise again. Did I hurt his Saiyan pride? Very good! I bet he knows, he could be a glorious fighter like his father. But that hellcat forced him to live a human’s life...  
  
“We don’t have time for this. He can be in danger, seriously hurt or something even worse…”  
  
At least he had some brains, not like the others who thankfully weren’t there.  
  
“Go back home and search for him there in a few miles radius. I’ll do the same… somewhere else.” I told the boy and he obeyed without a single word.  
  
I was sure that Kakarot was alive, since I felt him, so there was no need to search for him in the afterworld. I was worried about him, even though I wasn’t able to admit it aloud. I felt his younger cub’s sadness. His energy was almost the same as the idiot’s. I had a strange urge to go and soothe him.  
  
_What the bloody hell is going on with me?_  
  
Last night I had a dream about me and Kakarot, having a family on our own. I was holding _our_ cub in my arms and it felt so normal. I was so happy like I have never been. Or I should say I never will be. The cub slowly fell asleep in my arms and Kakarot purred to lull me to sleep as well.  
  
_How long will my pride make me suffer?_  
  
I wasn’t able to find him, no matter how hard I tried. The idea of someone hurting him made me anxious and filled me with anger. I flew back to his old home but nothing was there. I blinked a few times, because I didn’t want to believe my eyes.  
  
_What the hell did you do now, you idiot?!_  
  
Gohan landed next to me and I saw on his face, he was crying. His eyes were still red.  
  
“He is alive.” I said to calm him down a little. “I feel his energy, but I’m unable to locate it.”  
  
“What happened to his old house?”  
  
He was looking at me like I should know the answer.  
  
“It wasn’t here when I arrived.” I told him, before he would come up with the idea that I destroyed it.  
  
“I’ll ask around.” he said, and flew off.  
  
My heart was beating unusually fast. It was hard to admit, even just to myself, that I didn’t want to lose him. I was so close… So close to accepting whatever he wanted to offer. I won’t be able to forgive myself, if he dies…  
  
I felt a sharp pain in the back of my neck. It was Kakarot’s pain. I was eager to find out who made him suffer and rip their spines out.  
  
**_So cold…_**  
  
First, it seemed like a thought of mine, but I wasn’t freezing and it helped me to realize it was him. My entire body was itching for a good fight.  
  
I hoped if he could reach me, even for just a few seconds, I can reply the same way.  
  
**_Kakarot! Where are you?!_**  
  
**_Under the house… I can’t see… Everything’s so dark..._**  
  
His voice faded out soon.  
  
Under the house, but where in the bloody hell is the house? Someone is torturing him and I couldn’t do a thing against it! It felt like another wound on my pride. What am I good for, if I can’t even do such a small thing? I flew back home as fast as I could, and told the onna to build a machine which is able to find Kakarot.  
  
“I think he just went to train on another planet. It happened in the past, do you remember?” she asked, smiling. “He’s probably very upset due to recent events. It is possible he just wants some time alone to figure things out.”  
  
I clenched my fists, trying to fight the urge to hit her really hard. She is my wife and I would die for her at any given moment... But I couldn’t just let it go.  
  
“He’s in pain!!” I yelled at her without thinking.  
  
I instantly regretted what I’ve said, but it was too late.  
  
“How do you know?” she asked with a strange smile.  
  
“Since we fused I feel him.”  
  
_Why do I choose the worst ways possible to describe things? Am I an idiot, who loves to embarrass himself?_  
  
“And you would like to feel him inside of your body as well, hm?”  
  
“ONNA!!” I screamed with a blood-red face.  
  
She was just laughing at me loudly, and I felt my face burning.  
  
“It’s okay. We all know you have a thing for _your Kakarot_ and you know what? I totally understand you. If I wouldn’t be a woman, I still would think he’s sexy as fuck. He doesn't even know what he could do with his charm... Or maybe he does... And it worked on you."  
I just wanted her to stop...  
  
“You are incredibly cute when you are blushing! I want to squeeze your cheeks…”  
She attempted to do so, but I gently pushed her away.  
  
“Can you build that damned machine or not?!”  
  
I tried to seem as angry as possible to hide my embarrassment.  
  
“Wasn’t I called a genius on multiple occasions?”  
  
I hoped she was right…

***

_I felt so small, like a cub. I opened my eyes, and I saw Raditz. He was just a kid. He was holding me and caressed my hair._

_"Maybe you are weak, but still my brother."_

_"He's so cute!"_

_Mom took me from him, and kissed my nose. I sneezed, which made her laugh._

_"Bardock! Look! He pulls that funny face, like you do!"_

_My father grumbled something. The smell of cigarettes filled my nostrils and I sneezed again._

_"Do you think I'm smelly, huh?" He asked, taking me in his big hands. "Don't ever start smoking, okay? That shit kills you slowly before you would even notice."_

_He sat down, carefully holding me._

_"I was told that I won't live more than twenty years. I was a scrawny cub. Weak. Sick. But I did my hardest and look, I'm still alive. It all depends on your will to live. I know you will do great things. I feel it in my bones."_

_He wrapped me in a blanket and rocked me to sleep._


	5. Home

I regained consciousness in a strange place. The whole situation was weird, the last thing I remembered was the cold floor and the darkness of the basement of our house, and how tried to reach Vegeta through our mental link, but I wasn't sure he heard me. 

The air was somewhat thicker than I got used to, but nothing I couldn’t deal with. Everything was so different... I felt stronger kis than humans usually have. A familiar scent filled my nostrils and I decided to follow it. It led me to a small house. I knocked on the door without thinking, and a slim Saiyan woman opened the door.

“Bardock, I told you---” 

Her scent almost made me cry... I just instinctively knew who she was. Her scent was the first I ever inhaled in my life, imprinting the untearable bond in my mind. She pulled me into a tight hug without saying a word. Her embrace was much stronger than any earthling’s, but I didn’t mind it at that moment. I missed her so badly... I tried to suppress the sadness I felt for not knowing my family, but it always found a way to surface. 

"Mom...?" 

I didn't really know what to say. It was so surreal, yet comforting as she wrapped her thin, but strong arms around me. She purred a little, inhaling my scent deeply. 

"You grew so big..." She sniffled, wiping her tears off her cheeks, slowly letting go of me. 

She invited me in, ready to ask the all the questions coming to her mind, but first she told me to take a seat at the dining table. 

"How did you get there?" 

"The last thing I recall is that I was having an ugly argument with my wife and the man she was cheating me on and I felt something like a bug bite and everything went black…” 

She nodded, stepping closer, caressing my face. It has been so many years since she could touch me, so I let her savor the moment. 

"You're at home. The war is over. Your father killed Frieza." 

"He… he did what…?" 

I stared back at her in awe. Maybe it's another timeline where he succeeded. He must be very proud. At least I would be, in his shoes. The sick bastard did unthinkable things to the ones he decided to pick on. 

"We all got the elite status... except for you. But none of us ever gave up searching for you…” she held a little pause. “I bet you are hungry. Food will be ready soon. I bet Bardock and Raditz will be surprised to see you again." 

"I guess they're out to train." 

Mom nodded again, putting a basket of fruits on the table. 

"But they will arrive soon. Have some of these until then.” 

I took a big, orange-like fruit. The peel came off surprisingly easily, and it tasted just right. Neither too sweet, nor too sour. Mom seemed to be happy to see me enjoying it. About ten minutes later father and Raditz stepped in and I heard my brother's annoyed voice. 

"It's called training, not 'how to kill your son in the name of some sparring'..." 

"You are alive, so stop bitchin' like a sassy kid." 

As they entered the kitchen, both of them froze for a second. The shock was written on their faces, but our father had a strange grimace on his face. 

"Kakarot?” my brother asked, stepping closer. 

I needed to remind myself it's not the same Raditz I've been fighting with. I nodded, unsure of what to say. He seemed curious, but had some wariness in his eyes. He was cautious to approach me, ready to attack if the situation requires. 

"I want to know how did you get back here." My father said, his voice rather sounded demanding. 

"Honestly? I don't know. I had an argument with my wife and then I felt something like a bug bite and I woke up in the desert. I followed my nose so I ended up here." 

"Is it really him?" Raditz asked our mother. 

"Yep. I recognize his smell. He's your brother, I'm hundred percent sure." she replied with a genuine smile. 

Father wasn't so easy to convince. He lit up a cigarette and kept questioning me: 

"The name of the planet you've been sent to?" 

"Earth. I suffered a bad head injury when I landed, which made me completely forget everything about my previous life." 

He just made a disappointed sound, but seemed to accept my reply. 

"How was your life there?" My brother asked. 

I tried to cut out the bad memories, telling about Grandpa Gohan and the other masters I had, my adventures, fights, tournaments, and of course, Vegeta. I thought it'd be smarter to not talk about the dragon balls. Mother and father exchanged a weird look. 

"You have a mate." the latter said to me. 

"I do, but I ended that relationship. It wasn't good for either of us." 

The word 'mate' made me think of what Vegeta told me about Saiyan relationships. I didn't remember much, but one thing: they were completely unfamiliar with the concept of marriage. 

Raditz just smirked at me. 

"You can have any chick here easily with that power level. Even if you are trying to hide most of it, the scouters never lie.” 

"I don't want to act like some guy who knows all the secrets of this universe, but this power will fade as I grow older. Like I wasn't born with it, I won't die having it. But I am sure there will be a great fight before I go." 

"You have a partner, but you are not mated in the Saiyan way." mother told me. 

Does it mean that me and Vegeta have this? Since we fused, I often felt the changes of his moods or certain strong emotions. But we haven’t had sex… Yet? 

"Oh my, you like someone! Am I right? Tell me, tell me!!" 

Mom looked all excited about it, and I knew she won't leave me alone until I tell her. 

"Let's say I did something which may have caused me to have something like this bonding thing. It's a technique, which is called fusion. With this two warriors can merge their ki and bodies to become a stronger and smarter foe, and they can use the techniques they both know and their power level becomes much higher." 

"Interesting. I want to see how that fusion of yours works in real life." Father said, grabbing some salty crackers and stuffed them all into his mouth in seconds. 

"But if planet Vegeta was destroyed..." Raditz started. "How do you know that we are your family?" 

I took a deep breath and told them everything I could remember of. 

"I will never, ever kidnap anyone's cub!!!" my brother said angrily. 

"Your alternate self did. It wasn't you." Mom told him, trying to calm down my brother. “If I understand your story well, he was forced to work for Frieza.” 

“Yes. Only him, Vegeta, Nappa, Tarble and I survived the destruction of the planet. I was sent away to get stronger, just a little before it happened. Tarble has the same story, but his destination was a different place than mine.” 

I continued after eating another of those orange-like things, and they were listening curiously. Once or twice they have asked some questions which I tried to answer as detailed as I could. 

"Bardock... We have to report that our son came back.. even though he needs to go back to his timeline while he's here he needs an alibi." 

Father stepped closer to mom and kissed her temple. She blushed a little and wrapped her tail on his left wrist. I couldn’t help but smiled at them. I never imagined my father to be the affectionate type. Maybe it was a rare occasion. 

"Leave it to me, mate. Kakarot, follow me." 

Father led me to a giant building. We walked along a long corridor and he knocked on a door at the end of it. 

"Your name, rank, registration number, relationship status?" A monotone computer voice asked. 

"Bardock, elite, B02-757, bonded." 

"What's your issue?" 

"Reporting a missing person found alive." 

"Fill the form according to the description down below on the screen." 

He was typing furiously and when he finally finished the same emotionless voice said: 

"Second floor, third door on the left." 

We walked there in silence, and he knocked on the door. As I walked in, I felt all the eyes on me. I heard some Saiyans whispering about me. The office was way too crowded but thankfully soon father's name was called. We were invited into a small office room by a short haired woman. She introduced herself as Kyuuri. 

"We need to do some examinations. These are for security reasons if he carries any illnesses or mental health problems. Please don't hesitate to ask any questions." Kyuuri said. 

"We have no questions." father replied, and I kept my mouth shut. 

We both watched her typing something on a small touchscreen. 

"He will have his mental and physical tests in three days. We will send a letter to your address containing all the details and appointments. I can see he's your son, but the laws are strict and the doctors must prove it with a blood test." 

"Wait, what?!" 

I felt the hit or run reaction kick in. No needles, please... 

She wanted my father to sign some papers and then we could go home. 

***

Five days passed. Five insanely long and hard days. I wasn't myself and everyone noticed that. I started questioning my feelings about Kakarot. His happy-go-lucky attitude was so unnatural for a Saiyan, but still, in combat he changed into something different. Something I didn't even know the name of. He annoyed me, but if he skipped just one day of training with me I felt angry about it. I tried to blame it on the fusion, but I had to realise that I had these feelings way before we merged into one person. But that helped me to sort them out. 

"Vegeta, please come to eat!" Bulma asked me for the umpteenth time. "This isn't you!! Quit moping and get your lazy ass up!" 

"What?!" 

She grabbed my left ear and dragged me to the kitchen, not giving a flying fuck about I could easily kill her without breaking a sweat. 

"Sit." she said. 

When I did, Bulma continued. 

"Look, I know you have feelings for him. We all know." 

I opened my mouth to deny what she said, but no words came out. My voice betrayed me, admitting she’s right, without saying it aloud. 

"I'm not mad. I already knew it for years. I am not a Saiyan, I'm just a mere human. But I know things. 

I remained silent, just looked at her. It was my fault, even if it wasn’t intentional. But I still would have died for her in any given time without a single thought... 

"You are craving something I'm unable to give." 

She sighed, caressing my face. The movement surprised me and sent shivers down my spine. It brought back memories of things I wanted to forget. I kept my mouth shut about what happened on Frieza’s ship, I didn’t want anyone’s pity, but it was slowly eating me away on the inside. I was well aware of the fact, it will keep torturing me in my dreams until I die, and I didn’t want to put this burden on anyone’s shoulder. 

"I just want to help. That's all. And no more sleeping pills. I know you took them from my lab. I need you to focus." 

I was curious but I didn't ask anything. I knew she would tell. 

"You are able to feel his ki, am I right?" 

I nodded. I often checked it, sometimes I caught myself doing it without a reason. 

"He's alive, but his energy is dangerously low. He won’t last long if his ki keeps decreasing.” 

A sad expression creept up on Bulma’s face. She obviously didn’t want Kakarot to die. Neither did I, my worry was increasing by every passing minute. 

"I was working on the machine you asked but... I hate to admit it, I can't do it. It needs more advanced technology than I thought. Here, on Earth we don't have such." 

I let out a frustrated growl. I wasn't mad at her, but the situation was so infuriating. It reminded me those times under Frieza. We were so helpless. Then an idea popped into my mind. 

I walked back to my room and started to look for that handcrafted dagger I got from my father when I was around four. I only hoped it would work. Originally mates did the blood ritual to find their other half. It usually gave at least a clue bout the location of the other Saiyan. Technically he was my mate for that short period while we were fused… Our ki merged, even though we didn't have sex. 

I cut my left lower arm. The dripping blood slowly formed a pool on the floor. I barely remembered the words but I did my hardest to not to stutter or stop. 

Teasingly slowly the pool formed into Kakarot's home. This wasn't much help... Then it took the shape of my home planet. I thought I was hallucinating and tried to get up, but the world blacked out.


End file.
